I woke up early this morning because our cat, Ruby, licked my eye and was so eager to have her breakfast. I forgot that she is already used eating early in the morning because of my early shifts, before I leave for work, I’m used to feed her as early as 5am. Hahaha! So a while ago, she jumped on me and wanted to be fed. So silly.
After I fed Ruby, I went back to sleep, I felt so drowsy and tired. I woke up with my legs aching and my back hurts. T_T
I woke up finally at around half nine when Paul opened the TV, the volume woke me up. Why does he can’t watch TV with a soft sound? I can’t open my eyes but I can hear the TV, it annoyed me. I wanted to sleep more. My body felt like I am paralyzed but it’s painful. My mind was not ready to be awake. I’m on a holiday. I got hungry and finally decided to wake up and make some yogurt bowl. Paul is leaving for work. I needed to remind him that he needs to transfer the money he owe me last Saturday when he decided to get a takeaway. He gave me an exact 25GBP. Bro?! That was 25.27GBP !!! He owe me 27p. Anyway, he can’t be asked. That was my budget anyway. I don’t have any plans getting a takeaway this week. Besides, he almost ate all of them, I gave him all. Cos I can’t eat meat this week. Yesterday, I asked Paul to meet his mum this coming Saturday, and we’ll go up to London to have dinner. Like bro?! Why don’t you want to meet your family??? If Philippines is just a few hours away, I would go home like every 3 months. I miss them so much. Not now, because I still have this little grouch to my dad. I was not even talking to him since Saturday even asking how he was. I know he’s ok. He’s fine with his chickens. He was also trying to call from our group chat and no one answered. My mum is still in Cebu, and my sister didn’t know I have this displeasure towards him and she was the only talking to him regarding the house title processing. My sister is better than me on that matter so she can help him. I just have this little “Don’t care” attitude today. I can’t be asked.
Sometimes, it feels good to have this accursed attitude. Not being sweet, kind girl. After all, I don’t live at that house anymore. Before the end of the day, I will always feel guilt and trap.
Today my dear friends, we have this beautiful verse from Matthew. A verse declaring how selfless Jesus is. He came as a man here on earth, born to be a man but died as a King. It reminded us that Jesus is truly the son of God, not only the son but only begotten son who died for us and paid all our debts. Like yesterday’s verse, the lamb which is a symbol of purity and sacrifice. Today’s verse talks about that the lamb is not just an offering but a ransom. Ransom for humanity. God’s wrath from the beginning to the Israelites, being rude, always complaining, greedy, creating wars and conflicts, full of sins makes God hate humanity and tempted to destroy earth again. But because God is merciful and loving, always forgiving. He sent his son to deliver us from evil. Jesus was made not only for me but for everyone. All we need to do is accept him and let his love shine all over us. Share it to everyone and remind us that God will always be there for us even at dark times.
Problems and conflicts are always there in human life. We can’t erase that. I remember my mum when I was in high school, we had a conversation about problems coming in our lives. She was provoked when I told her that problems are always there. You can’t erase them. I was trying to say that God sometimes gives us trials because he knows we can overcome it. He never gives a problem we can’t solve. And my mum kicked me, she was so angry at me and shouted, “Kung pwde lang alisin yang problema, erase-in na dapat yan!!!” And she kicked me. I was surprised and told myself that my mum was never an open minded person. Her understanding that God never made problems for us is not broad.
I want to quote a verse from the bible about problems, it’s from James, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.” (V1:2-4)
It’s true my dear friends, I encountered several trials in my life. Not just one, multiple times. Sometimes, it’s repetitive and I did it over repeat mistakes without realizing its lessons. Sometimes, mistakes are all lesson. We will never value life without life’s mistakes. It takes a lot of courage and God’s constant help to overcome trials.
Also, this verse talks about Humbleness. The son of God did not come to be served. He was not even born in a deluxe hospital with fine robes and linen. He was born in a manger. A manger my dear friends is an open trough or box found in stables or barns, used for holding feed for livestock like horses and cattle. Pharisees and even Kings believed that he will be born King. With a bed made in fine carving, with jewels and embellishments but no. Jesus was born with a humble beginning to remind us that we humans should be humble as his. We don’t have nothing. We are just human, and it is right to serve the Lord with humbleness and righteousness because he is the son of God. It is our duty to serve him and to pay back all the ransom He had sacrificed for us.
I feel sometimes why is life so unfair? Why is it always me that needs to sacrifice and understand things? But I always thank Jesus for he taught me how to sacrifice and be humble. It should be me who cares and understands situations even when everyone doesn’t. Because that is true Christianity. Jesus humbles Himself so I should be too.
God bless us all!
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